Looking for the perfect bedtime story for your children?  The original eight classic stories published in 1697 by Charles Perrault (pronounced Per-oh) will make a charming addition to your flesh-craving, gore-loving child’s collection of literature.  Read these to the little ones as they bounce themselves into bed and they’ll be sure to dream of snakes, slaughtered women hanging in their closets, and child-eating ogres who can fly (using special boots) to your house in five minutes!  …And you thought fairy tales were for babies!

Though these stories may not be quite the way you remember them, with tenderhearted Walt Disney songs humming in the background, they are quite fantastic pieces that are the archetypal foundations of the stories that we have come to know over the course of our lives.  Cinderella actually goes to the ball twice, the breadcrumb trails lead to Tom Thumb before they do Hansel & Gretel, and Maleficent is not actually named as such in the real story of Sleeping Beauty.  Before you continue thinking you know the real stories, read these ones.  They’ll help any English teacher who needs a good read-aloud story to convey a theme, or any grandmother who wants to scare the bajeezus out of her grand kids.

Gary gives it two paws.  He’s a scaredy-cat.